Today, while procrastinating, my roommate sent me a link to a very interesting TED Talk about gaslighting. I’ll link the video below if for any reason this blog post intrigues you. But while watching it and also simultaneously racking my brain for an idea for a blog post, I thought again of Not Sidney’s concept of fesmerization.
Gaslighting is defined by Ariel Leve in the video as, “an emotionally abusive tactic that makes the victim question their own sanity and perception of reality”. In the video she speaks about her chaotic childhood growing up with her mother that was a very successful poet. She explains several instances in which her mother would use various forms of gaslighting to convince Ariel that her outrageous parties and gaggles of insults were not real and that they didn’t actually harm her. After explaining these stories she shares four tactics that she had developed to cope with her mother’s abuse.
Leve’s tactics to deal with the gaslighting reminded me of Not Sidney’s fesmerization because she used them as a coping method and so did Not Sidney. Especially in the instance of his sexual assault, when he uses fesmerization to stop his teacher, who is assaulting him, to make the attack less painful.
I thought it was interesting that in the video she talked about coping strategies for dealing with manipulation but Not Sidney essentially uses manipulation as a coping mechanism. This reenforced the concept of the both/and that we’ve discussed all semester because manipulation is involved in both situations but it used as both a form of abuse and a form of resisting abuse.